And the Reality Is?

Doing dishes (erlack!) I found myself making a mental list. What kind of mental list you say? Well, the sort that involves breasts and babies and awkward moments and what one might really-really wish they'd known beforehand just to gird their uh...bazooms as it were. And I knew, I just KNEW it was a list to be shared...*insert evil giggle* (that is, if you can giggle evilly....) We'll call it:

THE LIST OF THINGS I DARN WELL WISH I'D KNOWN BEFORE....

~  It doesn't matter whether or not you are well endowed before babies, those girls  WILL. GET. BIGGER.

~ You may find yourself needing to replace a shirt SEVERAL times a day those first few months if you mistakenly bend over to tie your shoes, or lean against anything in general.

~ When preparing to feed your wee bairn, you might accidentally flash the mailman who will, from then on, flush a faint pink whenever you open the door for a package. (yeah, well maybe mailmen shouldn't peak through large, uncurtained windows. sheesh.)

~ You very well may give up on young pizza delivery boys ability to look at your face and instead just send your (criminally laughing) husband to the pizza place to get it. (seriously though, this kind of husband-laughter should be punishable by something, right?)

~ You will find yourself part of an impromptu baby feeding party in the church nursery and wonder why you don't just stop pretending you're going to hear the sermon and start planning nursing party potlucks?

~  You will develop a love/hate relationship w/ your bra

~ Bikinis become the enemy....and women who wear them? ~~pure evil.

~ One word: Teething.

~ And one thing I really wish I'd known before? I wish I'd known how much I'd cherish being so important, so loved by someone so tiny. (Awww, come on. you knew I'd end it all mushy right?)

 “It is no small thing when they, who are so fresh from God, love us.”~ Charles Dickens